Episode 16

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum ...

Ed:  Hey Jazzer, comin’ down The Bull tonight ?  Jolene’s doin’ a few numbers and Dad’s doin’ a show wi’ ‘is ferrets.  Should be a good laugh.

Jazzer:  Huv ye furgoaten ?  Ah’m barred frae the pub and it’s daen ma heid in.

Ed:  Oh yeah, I forgot.  Wot was all that about ?

Jazzer:  Ah wis watchin’ ma Braveheart video wi’ the Prof - he loves history.  Ah could tell he wis impressed, he couldna speak when it finished.  Then Ah hud haggis n’ Irn Bru fur ma tea an Ah came ower a’ Scottish, like.

Ed:  Well you’re a right idiot, Jaz.  You’ll ‘ave to come up wi’ somat special to get back into Lilian’s good books.

Jazzer:  Ah ken, d’ye think ma heid zips up the back  ?  Ah’m workin’ oan it.  Onywise, hoo’re ye goan tae the pub wi’ ?  Is it Emma?

Ed: No way.  She’s a mad cow these days. Only interested in gettin’ a house and pushing an ‘oover round it.  I’m ‘appy at ‘ome wi’ Mum, Dad and  the ferrets.

Jazzer:  Whit aboot yon pony, Bartleby?

Ed:  Had to eat ‘im.  Couldn’t afford the vet bills.

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum ...

(Editor:  That will get the vegans going - and Her Maj.)