Episode 43

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum ...

(Sound of front door opening)

Jennifer:  Hello Mum, I’m not too early am I ?

Peggy:  No dear, lunch isn’t quite ready yet so we can have a chat first.  Come into the drawing room.  Hilda is sunning herself on the sofa.

Jennifer:  I brought you some game pie and some venison for the freezer.  And there’s a pheasant casserole in the car.

Peggy:  For Heaven’s sake Jenny, you’re obviously not getting enough sex either ! Jill Archer keeps bombarding me with food, too.  It was cream horns this morning.  If that’s not Freudian I don’t know what is.

Jennifer: Whatever do you mean, Mum ?  You know I’ve always loved cooking.

Peggy:  Well I was hoping that now you have lost your Aga and have a new special friend you could enjoy some vigorous hanky panky instead.  Jack and I were very fond of that.

Jennifer:  So you don’t mind that I’m thinking of leaving Brian for someone else ?

Peggy:  Certainly not !  I have no idea why you stayed with that immoral, philandering bastard all those years.  Ruairi is a lovely boy but that was the last straw for me.  As for dumping chemical waste and selling Home Farm ...

Jennifer:  Oh Mum,  I’m so pleased to hear you say that but I’m not sure you will be so happy to know that my friend is a woman.

Peggy:  Even better.  I mean we’re not talking about having children, are we ?  You’ve done your duty on that side of things, four is enough for any woman.

Jennifer:  It’s lovely to have your support Mum, it means a great deal to know that you are so broad minded.

(Hilda:  She’s broadminded alright.  Ask her about her younger man.)

(Sound of front door opening)

Jakob:  Hello Peggy, and how is your cute little pussy today ?

🎼. Dum to dum ti dum ti dum ...

(Ed.  Can someone please call an ambulance for the veterinary advisor ?)