Episode 50

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

Jill:  Hello, Peggy.  How are you this morning ?

Peggy:  I’m fine thank you, Jill.  I’m glad you could come round for coffee and a chat.

Jill:  I’ve brought some scones of course and some fairy cakes and chocolate brownies.

Peggy:  Good heavens, I’d be as big as a house if I ate all this !  What about your family ?

Jill:  Oh I’ve left twice as much in the kitchen for them and Leonard.

Peggy:  Well make yourself comfortable in the drawing room, dear, and I’ll bring in the coffee.

Jill:  Hello, Hilda, how are we this morning ?

Hilda:  MIAOW !

Jill:  No need to scratch, you vicious object !

Peggy:  What was that, dear ?

Jill:  I was just saying hello to Hilda.

Peggy:  I wouldn’t bother, Jill, she’ll have your hand off.  Now then, how are you getting on with Leonard these days.

Jill:  I’m so happy.  He’s such a considerate man with lovely manners and a great sense of humour.

Peggy:  Yes, yes but how is he in the bedroom department ?  I’m no Pamela Stephenson but I think your manic baking is a result of sexual frustration.  Am I correct ?

Jill:  Well, Peggy, I must admit that age has taken its toll on Leonard’s equipment but he refuses to go to his GP for help or advice.

Peggy:  Never mind his doctor.  I’ll have a word with Jakob when he calls round to have a look at my pussy.

Jill:  Jakob ?  But he’s a vet !

Peggy:  I know but he’s been helping Tony with Big Boy, his Angus bull, who seemed to have lost interest in the herd.  Jakob gave Tony something to put in his feed and now Big Boy has to be dragged out of the field to give the cows a rest.

Jill:  Are you suggesting I put some of this stuff in a lemon drizzle cake and feed it to Leonard ?

Peggy:  Got it in one.  Now, here’s your coffee.  One lump or two ?

Jill: He’ll definitely need two.

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

(Ed.  Aw naaaw!  What will Ruth say ?)







Comments

  1. Message for the week: we'll eat again

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