Episode 51
🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum ...
Jazzer: Hey, Prof, whit am Ah gonnae dae ? Ah’m still banned frae The Bull and ma liver thinks ma throat’s cut.
Jim: Are you sure you’re not drinking, because if that’s the case who is downing my whisky ? It can’t be Alistair, he’s far too straitlaced these days.
Jazzer: Weel, mebbe Ah huv hud the odd wee dram but Ah need help, Prof.
Jim: I have worked very hard to help you, Jazzer. I’ve tried circumlocution, elocution and adumbration to get you back into that dratted pub. What can I do next ?
Jazzer: Ah huv nae idea whit yer on aboot but whit aboot a disguise ?
Jim: That’s not a bad idea, Jazzer. I had no idea you had such an imagination.
Jazzer: Ah’m needin help, no patronisin.
Jim: Well you’re in luck. There’s an RAF uniform upstairs that Daniel left behind and I’m sure we can transform you into Flight Lieutenant James McCreary in no time.
(later on in The Bull)
Jolene: I see we’ve got a man in uniform in ‘ere tonight, Lilian. Makes a nice change,
dunnit ?
Lilian: Hmm, yes, Jolene. I am usually won over by that kind of thing but there’s something odd about the way he walks. It’s as if he has a poker stuck somewhere it doesn’t belong, if you get my meaning.
Jolene: You could be right but he is putting away the booze big time and profits will be well up tonight. It’s a bit odd though that Jim keeps comin to the bar. An officer and a gentleman shouldn’t ‘ave a pensioner fetchin and carrying for ‘im. Ooh, ‘ere ‘e comes now. Looks like ‘e’s remembered ‘is manners.
Jazzer: Gie’s a pint, doll, and a double dram fur the Prof.
Lilian: I knew it ! You’ll feel ma fit in the crack o yer erse if you don’t GET OUTA MA PUB !
🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...
(Ed. Lilian needs to decide which side of the Border she’s on and which soap opera she’s in.)
Jazzer: Hey, Prof, whit am Ah gonnae dae ? Ah’m still banned frae The Bull and ma liver thinks ma throat’s cut.
Jim: Are you sure you’re not drinking, because if that’s the case who is downing my whisky ? It can’t be Alistair, he’s far too straitlaced these days.
Jazzer: Weel, mebbe Ah huv hud the odd wee dram but Ah need help, Prof.
Jim: I have worked very hard to help you, Jazzer. I’ve tried circumlocution, elocution and adumbration to get you back into that dratted pub. What can I do next ?
Jazzer: Ah huv nae idea whit yer on aboot but whit aboot a disguise ?
Jim: That’s not a bad idea, Jazzer. I had no idea you had such an imagination.
Jazzer: Ah’m needin help, no patronisin.
Jim: Well you’re in luck. There’s an RAF uniform upstairs that Daniel left behind and I’m sure we can transform you into Flight Lieutenant James McCreary in no time.
(later on in The Bull)
Jolene: I see we’ve got a man in uniform in ‘ere tonight, Lilian. Makes a nice change,
dunnit ?
Lilian: Hmm, yes, Jolene. I am usually won over by that kind of thing but there’s something odd about the way he walks. It’s as if he has a poker stuck somewhere it doesn’t belong, if you get my meaning.
Jolene: You could be right but he is putting away the booze big time and profits will be well up tonight. It’s a bit odd though that Jim keeps comin to the bar. An officer and a gentleman shouldn’t ‘ave a pensioner fetchin and carrying for ‘im. Ooh, ‘ere ‘e comes now. Looks like ‘e’s remembered ‘is manners.
Jazzer: Gie’s a pint, doll, and a double dram fur the Prof.
Lilian: I knew it ! You’ll feel ma fit in the crack o yer erse if you don’t GET OUTA MA PUB !
🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...
(Ed. Lilian needs to decide which side of the Border she’s on and which soap opera she’s in.)
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