Episode 90

🎼  Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

Harrison:  In all my years in the police force I’ve never seen anything like it.  A room full of pensioners tanked up on sherry and cherry brandy cheering on three male strippers in animal masks. When the boss reads my report she’ll think I’m on drugs.

Fallon:  You have to admit, Harrison, it was a great night and it will give those old dears somethin to talk about all year.

Harrison:  And what were you doing there, I thought you were going to the WI meeting ?

Fallon:  That was the WI meeting !  Mrs Woolley decided to liven it up a bit - some party animal she turned out to be.

Harrison:  Well, I’ve had to give her a caution plus the so-called Beasts of Ambridge and the women who rushed the stage.  If this gets into the Echo there are going to be some very red faces round here.

Fallon:  Come on, Harrison, no harm done. The Bull made a packet and Susan Carter will ‘ave  a field day in the shop, churnin out all the gossip.  She reckons her Christopher was the star of the show.

Harrison:  And what does Alice have to say about it all ?

Fallon:  She was so impressed, she’s stopped drinkin !

Harrison:  Well, Pat Archer wasn’t impressed.  I had to arrest her too when she barged in with her protest banner and started taking her clothes off.

Fallon:  Yeah, that weren’t a pretty sight.  But tell me, none of ‘em will be charged, will they ?

Harrison:  I don’t think so.  Mrs Woolley says it was a private function to raise money for the WI so I’ll put it down as a charity event.

Fallon:  But what about the strippers ?

Harrison:  No money changed hands there but to be honest I’ve never heard of strippers being paid in cake.

Fallon:  Cake !  What kind of cake ?

Harrison:  Lemon drizzle I believe.

Fallon:  Harrison - you’ve got to get me the recipe for that cake !

Harrison:  How am I going to do that ?

Fallon:  Have you ever taken your clothes off in public ?

Harrison:  Well, now you come to mention it...

🎼  Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

(Ed.  Oops, will history repeat itself ?)


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