Episode 93

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

Brian:  Morning, Jenny, shall I make you some coffee?

Jennifer:  I think I need a lie down.

Brian:  But you’ve only just got up - you can’t still have a hangover.  It’s four days since your - what shall we call it - little escapade.

Jennifer:  I do not have a hangover but it’s the first time in forty years you have offered to make me a coffee.

Brian:  Oh, hang on a minute, that’s a bit unfair.

Jennifer:  Unfair ?  I’ll tell you what’s unfair.  Unfair is your behaviour since the day I met you, taking me for granted, flaunting your affairs and leaving me to clear up the mess.

Brian:  Well, I think the shoe is on the other foot today, isn’t it ?

Jennifer:  Surely one indiscretion in a lifetime is allowed. ?

Brian:  Not sure the magistrate will see it like that.  What are you going to say in your defence ?

Jennifer:  I will tell them the truth...

Brian:  Oh, I wouldn’t do that.  Admitting you had two bottles of champagne before you left the house and then had five Hung Like a Mule cocktails at The Bull isn’t going to help.

Jennifer:  Not that bit.  I will say ‘Something snapped your honour’ - they like a bit of respect - ‘ and it was a moment of madness’.

Brian:  It was several moments of madness from what I was told.  You practically ravished poor Jazzer.  Are you going to represent yourself in court ?

Jennifer:  Don’t be ridiculous, Brian.  I have hired the  QC you used in the chemical dumping case.  He managed to get you a light sentence.

 Brian:  Yes and he cost a fortune.  Why do you think I had to sell Home Farm ?

Jennifer:  Oh, I am sure we can come to some arrangement.

 Brian:  I do hope so.  Perhaps your mother could tempt him with some lemon drizzle cake ?  It’s the gold standard round here at the moment.

Jennifer:  That’s a good idea, Brian. I will call her now.

Brian:  Well it’s either that or you sell the Birkin bag.

Jennifer:  Definitely not !  I might need that if I have to appeal.

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

(Ed.  Alice will not be happy.)






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