Episode 110

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

Fallon:  So ‘ow’s  the investigation into Cakebake goin or whatever it’s called ?

Harrison:  Get it right, Fallon.  You must know that every investigation these days is called something ‘gate’.  So it’s Cakegate if you must know, although I shouldn’t talk about work with you.

Fallon:  But I’m your wife, remember, and I don’t discuss our private conversations.  You’re not married to Susan Carter !

Harrison:  Thank the Lord for that.  I mean, Neil’s a nice bloke but how does he put up with that voice and the poisonous rubbish that Susan spouts all day ?

Fallon:  Just remember ‘ow lucky you are to ‘ave me.  Anyway, what’s ‘appenin with Cakegate ?

Harrison:  Now you’re starting to sound like Susan.

Fallon:  Oh give over, I want to know what’s still worryin you.

Harrison:  What worries me is that Jill’s lemon drizzle went for testing and it came back negative.

Fallon:  Well, that’s good ain’t it ?

Harrison:  Should have been the end of it but now Sabrina has been in touch with my boss and has made a complaint.

Fallon:  What about ?  Not enough plungin necklines for sale in Underwoods ?

Harrison:  It’s all a bit delicate and I’m not sure it’s really a police matter but it’s sort of linked to the cake.

Fallon:  And ?

Harrison:  Sabrina wants to know why all the women over 55 in Ambridge have suddenly turned into sexual predators.

Fallon:  You mean like ‘er ?  I’m amazed she’s admitted to being over 55.

Harrison:  She believes it might have been drug induced and that we should re-investigate the fracas  at The Bull when Jennifer, Shula and the Bishop’s wife were arrested.

Fallon:  Oh my god, that’s incredible - they all think they got off  scot-free !  Can this get any worse ?

Harrison:  Yes, the drug-testing lab has put in an order for a dozen lemon drizzles.

🎼. Dum ti dum ti dum ti dum...

(Ed.  I’m beginning to pine for a Victoria Sandwich.)

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